I currently live on my own with my 5 adorable cats who try and keep me sane. I have a medical condition called Von Hippel Lindau and currently have tumors in my kidneys, pancreas, adrenals and brain, I go through annual screening which I call my MOT so I can see if I will be ok for another year.
In the last couple of years I have taken up Cross Stitch and Crochet as a hobby. I have suffered with depression for a number of years and have never come to terms with losing my mum and soulmate on 29th Nov 1997.
My blog will be about day to day trials and tribulations that I go through to keep surviving and updates on my crafting skills and health.
Oh my love,you do sound lost. It sounds like you have been through alot of heart ache, I know a lot of people would have given up on life a long time ago, but you still being here is proof you are stronger than you think. Think about how your Mum would feel knowing you wanted to die? She wouldn't want that for her daughter. I know we've never met but I don't think that matters, the internet has been my saviour many times in my life and i'm glad we've formed a friendship online. Do you have a mobile? You can always text me if you're bored or lonely? I would suggest ringing me but I hate talking on the phone, I get really awkward!
As for bills etc, isn't there anything the council can do? Are you just living off the benefits at the moment? I'm assuming that isn't enough to support yourself and home? Are there any local help groups in your area? Or craft groups? I think going out and maybe joining a knitting club etc would be great for you! Or volunteering somewhere? Obviously that depends on your health etc.
Try not to sleep your life away. I know how hard it is not to just go to bed when you're bored, believe me I've slept 20 out of 24 hours in the past, but you have got to force yourself up. Sorry if this isn't helping, I just want to be there for you as I know how you feel.
Sophie, you are such a wise and lovely young girl for your age and I am so glad I have met you online, sometimes really close people around you can never understand what you are going through but then you happen to come across a stranger, going through similar tests in life and they become a real god send, you my love are one of them. I completely understand the telephone thing as I hate talking on the phone or letting people hear or see me cry but online it so much easier to express yourself, no one can see or judge you, I am crying just from reading your reply and me writing back, but they are tears of sadness and also relief. My mobile has a bar on it until the bill is paid so I cannot make any outgoing texts etc but once it is back up and running it would be nice to send you the odd little text now and again, will DM you my number on Twitter xxx
Oh my love,you do sound lost. It sounds like you have been through alot of heart ache, I know a lot of people would have given up on life a long time ago, but you still being here is proof you are stronger than you think. Think about how your Mum would feel knowing you wanted to die? She wouldn't want that for her daughter. I know we've never met but I don't think that matters, the internet has been my saviour many times in my life and i'm glad we've formed a friendship online. Do you have a mobile? You can always text me if you're bored or lonely? I would suggest ringing me but I hate talking on the phone, I get really awkward!
ReplyDeleteAs for bills etc, isn't there anything the council can do? Are you just living off the benefits at the moment? I'm assuming that isn't enough to support yourself and home?
Are there any local help groups in your area? Or craft groups? I think going out and maybe joining a knitting club etc would be great for you! Or volunteering somewhere? Obviously that depends on your health etc.
Try not to sleep your life away. I know how hard it is not to just go to bed when you're bored, believe me I've slept 20 out of 24 hours in the past, but you have got to force yourself up. Sorry if this isn't helping, I just want to be there for you as I know how you feel.
This won't last forever xxx
Sophie, you are such a wise and lovely young girl for your age and I am so glad I have met you online, sometimes really close people around you can never understand what you are going through but then you happen to come across a stranger, going through similar tests in life and they become a real god send, you my love are one of them. I completely understand the telephone thing as I hate talking on the phone or letting people hear or see me cry but online it so much easier to express yourself, no one can see or judge you, I am crying just from reading your reply and me writing back, but they are tears of sadness and also relief. My mobile has a bar on it until the bill is paid so I cannot make any outgoing texts etc but once it is back up and running it would be nice to send you the odd little text now and again, will DM you my number on Twitter xxx
ReplyDelete